Letters from The Editor
Dear Reader,
Did I ever recount my woeful tale regarding the time Dube Merrick rewired my internal cooling system to steam a cup of tea? My weekly servicing still has failed to find the source of the piercing nerve rattling steamwhistle.
There was another occasion when he recalibrated my motor neurons to the motion sensor security outside the Gazette's building? Every time something walked past the exterior of the building I had the uncontrollable embarrassing action of thumping against the desk.
Dear friends, you have no idea how difficult my job is here. My requests for reassignment to something less stressful such as: outer atmospheric storm beacons, military target bots; any function that allow me some dignity.
Signed,
Editor, Intergalactic Gazette
Dear Reader,
I received your letters, and alas I must strongly disagree. Mr. Dube Merrick's antics are not amusing, and should most certainly NOT be included in any brane-weave broadcasts. The IGNet would never stoop so low as to solicit any material or employ Dube Merrick.
Are you even reading what he writes? I'm surrounded by nimcumpoops.
If you met Dube Merrick, you would have some idea.
Signed,
Editor, Intergalactic Gazette